Reflection

At BFK's Outer Banks office, taking advantage of the chance to allow those things both great and enduring to provide the healthy perspective that can result from meditative self-reflection.

Correlation and Cole Hamels: Bad News

The more money that a star pitcher makes, the better a pitcher (lower ERA) he should be. Thus, a star pitcher's ERA should correlate negatively with his salary.

Let's consider the case of Cole Hamels:

Year ERA     Salary
2007 3.39      $400,000
2008 3.09      $500,000
2009 4.32      $4,350,000
2010 3.06      $6,650,000
2011 2.79      $9,500,000
2012 3.05      $15,000,000
2013 4.61*     $19,500,000
*Including 5/15/13 start

The correlation between Hamels' ERA and salary is 0.3296.

First, it's bad news that this is a positive correlation (higher salary is associated with higher ERA).

Second, it's bad news that the correlation is above the rule-of-thumb .30 mark, indicating that there's likely something more to the association than pure chance.

Note: This correlation is based on an N of 7, which doesn't quite meet the needs of the central-limit-theorem. Also, the correlation is likely driven by 2013, given the small N. This is all only for purposes of fun, however, so we'll suspend disbelief.

Awesome and Not-So-Awesome #2: The Mirror-Image Edition

Awesome and Not-So-Awesome for Monday, May 13th 2013: The Mirror-Image Edition

Awesome

• Having wisdom teeth extracted tomorrow (long-term)
• IRS investigations of Tea Party groups (Tea Partiers deserve every bad governmental thing that could happen to them)
• Freddy Galvis (utility infielder that plays like an MVP)
• Spring is breaking out (good-bye, cabin fever!)
• Seeing Rush perform Clockwork Angels live for the second time (amazing amazing amazing)

Not-So-Awesome

• Having wisdom teeth extracted tomorrow (short-term)
• IRS investigations of Tea Party groups (IRS' clumsiness in getting caught is fuel for Fox and the devil's radio of right-wing talk)
• Jimmy Rollins (MVP that plays like a utility infielder)
• Spring is breaking out (pollen)
• Seeing Rush perform Clockwork Angels live (standing three-plus straight hours is harder the next day than it was for the P/G, Power Windows, Presto, or Test for Echo tours)

Axis of Awful: 5/10/13

1. A Passage to Bangkok
Ma Bunny took me to see Rush tonight for my birthday. The show was at Mohegan Sun Arena at the giant Mohegan Sun Casino in Uncasville, CT. First, we'll get out of the way the fact that Rush was absolutely amazing and seeing them was an awesome birthday present. The Mohegan Sun Casino, however, was disgusting. One had to walk through the casino to get to the arena (of course) and the casino smelled like an ashtray. The walk in from the parking lot was like walking through the carpeted area next to the pool in summer at a Mississippi Holiday Inn in 1975. That is, it was disgustingly ugly and it smelled disgusting. Hey Casino people -- you have zillions of dollars -- how about buying some Glade plugins or maybe some Stick-Ups (remember them?). Hell, maybe if you just put a window in the goddamn place you could open .... oh, wait .... right .... people aren't supposed to know whether it's day or night outside. Sorry. How about a new filter for your HVAC system then? At any rate, your casino smells disgusting, the carpet is ugly, and the decor is tacky.

2. You're a Stalker, Charlie Brown!
Last month, Peter Robbins, the voice of Charlie Brown in the famous Christmas and Halloween specials,  "pleaded guilty ... to two felony counts of stalking and making criminal threats against his girlfriend, Shawna Kern, and a plastic surgeon who had performed her breast implant surgery." Evidently, the judge told him "Don't be a blockhead" at his sentencing. Well-played, your honor.

3. Phillies, You Make Me Sad

Dear Phillies,

I am only 9 months old and your poor play make me very sad. I'm too young to be so unhappy. Please play better and stop making me sad.

Sincerely,
Baby Bunny

The Phillies' Awfulness and the Bounds of Loyalty

I have been a Phillies fan since 1975. Truly, to suffer through that many losing seasons, needlessly blown-out arms, blown saves (I can't hear you, 1993 World Series, la la la la), games that should never have been played, and Ryan Howard strikeouts on down-and-away pitches, is to demonstrate a loyalty that borders on insanity.

However, the steady decline in offensive production since the Phillies got caught in May 2010 having their bullpen coach steal signs with binoculars has become almost too much to bear of late.

Heap onto that...

1. Roy Halladay who has lost his last two starts by a combined 28-4 (lasting only three innings in the latter game) and is giving up an average of 2.3 homers per game 
2. The worst outfield in MLB, 
3. Continuing bullpen problems with anyone not named Papelbon
4. Cole Hamels vying for the 2013 "Cliff Lee Award for Snake-bit Pitching"
5. Being ranked 13th (out of 15 in the NL) in errors committed, team ERA, saves, OPS, and HRs allowed
6. Being ranked 11th (out of 15 in the NL) in runs scored, BBs, and batting average

...and the pain is almost that of major organ failure.

Solutions?

1. For chrissakes, fire Rich Dubee.
2. Fire Ruben Amaro Jr. It's clear that he was only as good as his ability to do what Pat Gillick would tell him
3. Trade or fire all players not named Hamels, Lee, Kendrick, Papelbon, Utley, Pettibone, or Galvis.
4. And yes, let Charlie Manuel go, for his persistent support of things that don't work.

My reasoning is that I'd rather watch a roster of young kids hustling to make it in MLB and losing to more-experienced/talented rosters, than to watch a group of jaded and faded millionaires -- mixed in with a bunch of warning-track-power-prospects -- losing.

I just can't stand it.Seriously, it hurts.

Having It Both Ways

Obama tries to have it both ways on the FDA's Plan B decision. Newsflash to POTUS: The DOJ works for YOU. We're so glad HE'S comfortable with this.

We are unimpressed.

Awesome and Not-So-Awesome

Awesome and Not-So-Awesome: Tuesday, April 30th 2013


Awesome
Jason Collins' courage
FDA decision on morning-after-pill availability
Love From London by Robyn Hitchcock
Earth Rocker by Clutch
Alex Lifeson's induction speech at the Rock 'n Roll HOF Induction


Not-So-Awesome
Chris Broussard
ESPN backing Chris Broussard
Slamming one's head in a car door
Bill Flake's letter to Caren Teves
Kelly Ayotte's response to Erica Lafferty

5 Reasons You Despised Bush's Presidency

To celebrate the opening of George W's Presidential Library, AlterNet this past week published an epic list of 50 reasons people despised his presidency.

We think a shorter list suffices, and offer the following:

1. He is single-handedly responsible for more needless deaths of US citizens since any entity since the Confederate States of America.

2. He willingly accepted an electorally illegitimate presidency.

3. He set back scientific US progress in innumerable fields by decades.

4. He knowingly and willfully exacerbated economic inequality in the US.

5. His actions in his self-professed "War on Terror" constituted both war crimes and crimes against humanity.

Sure, there are more reasons than that but, seriously, do we need more?

The Ghost Wipe

So, yours truly has high triglycerides. Really high. Not "time to get a headstone for your pancreas" high, but about 65% of the way there. The 'ol LDL Cholesterol was high, too. This is all a lot of fun for someone who likes food and drink, as the high-triglyceride-ameliorating diet is essentially that of a diabetic alcoholic who has high cholesterol. Yay.

So, it was recommended that soluble fiber would be one great way to lower the 'ol LDL. This path leads to ... yes ... Metamucil and its psyllium husk fiber. Six capsules, thrice daily. That's pretty easy, and two jars of the stuff went fast. However, Metamucil isn't cheap. So, as one does when one is looking at a lifetime of monthly payments to Metamucil, one goes to Amazon seeking less-expensive alternatives.

This is where, upon looking at the Costco-brand (Kirkland) substitute for Metamucil, I ran into "the review" from Amazon user Maven Carraway, of Scottsdale, AZ:

Recently I embarked on a journey for the holiest of holies. The holy grail of bowel movements, if you will: one which results in a "ghost wipe". A wise woman once said "Nothing is as overrated as sex, and as underrated as a good bowel movement." While I can't completely agree with that, I will say this: These pills are saving me tens of dollars every year on toilet paper. [Emphasis added]

Wow. A "ghost wipe". I'm sure the Haunted Collector wouldn't want the evidence of this in his museum. Maybe the Ghost Hunters guys, working for Roto Rooter, wouldn't mind tracking down this ghost, though.

Seriously, though, I wondered "Is this some real fetish?"  Men are infamously bowel-obsessed, but this seems an odd one. Speaking of fetishes, I wonder if the woman shown on "My Strange Addiction" who eats toilet paper would consider a ghost wipe tissue clean enough to eat. Maybe that would be a different obsession?

Anyhow, so I wondered. A Google search returned the following from Urban Dictionary:

the result of wiping one's anus after a clean bowel movement. There is no fecal matter residue on the toilet paper after the first wipe. The wad would resemble that of a ghost after he/she makes feces.

And there is this video short that starts slow, but is worth hanging in there for:


We wonder whether it is possible to ever prove the ghost wipe, however, while maintaining some sense of modesty, as it is obviously quite-easy to fake unless one witnesses the endeavor firsthand. It's difficult to prove the existence of one thing that is defined by another thing's absence, without being exposed to charges of fraud.

This blog entry was actually full of really great material, by the way, until the ghost wiped it...

What Is The Color of Mourning In Advance?

We chose black for this, as it is the color of mourning. What is the color, however, of mourning in advance for all those whose lives will be needlessly and prematurely ended by gun violence? That is color that would have been most appropriate.

Courtesy of Huffington Post, meet the 46 persons who voted to kill children to sustain gun-industry and NRA-oriented profits.

However, let it be known that responsibility also lies at the hands of those who have created a situation where 60 votes are needed (the Republican Party), and those who failed to realize that if there's ever a time to use majority power to change the threshold to 51 votes to win, it was now (Harry Reid). Both sides have blood on their hands.